Don’t let a Vocation become your life-sentence

Loving what you do is often considered to be one of the greatest joys in life and many people agree that when they found what they considered to be their vocation, they felt a greater sense of achievement from their daily contribution to society.  Indeed, we even see certain roles as vocational choices, which only certain people can carry out; nursing, teaching, policing and paramedics are amongst the most often mentioned.  What happens, though, when you review your vocation and discover it no longer feels like that comfortable coat, or that you’re making a difference in a way that matters to you?

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My life has been largely about embracing changes that have impacted my life due to my health.  Each time I’ve believed I have found my “vocation” something has impacted my choice and caused me to ask the question, “Can I do something completely different and still feel this passionate about it?”

As I look back, I see that I’ve had a new vocation for each decade of my life, even beginning in my childhood:

Until the age of 10, I loved to sing
During my teen years I was sure I would be a Violinist
During my twenties I adored being in Personnel (Human Resources)
During my thirties I found my ability as an Event Manager
And in my forties I knew I had always meant to be a Mentor and Speaker

Now, in my first year into my fifties, I’ve found a new vocation, as an independent funeral celebrant.  Helping people at one of the lowest points in their lives, to deal with grief and somehow put together a tribute to a loved one which does them proud.

I found myself wondering how often we stay put in something because we believe the idea that if you’ve found your vocation in life, you should stick with it.  I wonder how often the changes that occur in our lives prevent us from making change that can feel overwhelming or even ungrateful.

I once worked with a client to help her make the change to become self-employed.  She’d spent over twenty five years in a role she had fallen out of love with more than a decade ago.  She told me it felt “wrong” to leave something she’d always wanted to do.  We so often pin our view of ourself to the job title we carry, and once we can let that go, it can be easier to accept it is not a “failure” to become something else.

We are allowed to change.  We are allowed to feel differently as we age and experience new things. Is it time for your to explore your next vocation in life?

Enjoy the journey,

Dinah

November Myddfai Musings

I’ve been reminded this week of the first time we saw North Lodge in Myddfai, now our home for almost three years.  It was a rainy day at the end of October 2014 and we knew we belonged here before we got through the gates.  All our previous homes have “spoken” to me long before we’ve reached the front door, and getting that sense of belonging was the first indicator that we’d found our forever-home.

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“If we think it’s beautiful on a cold, wet, grey and miserable day, then we’re going to be amazed by it in the spring” John said, as we sat discussing our offer in the car after just 20 minutes in the woods and even less time in the cottage.

And as I look out at our garden and small woodland, through a typical November drizzle, I still find myself overwhelmed by the beauty of this place.  We’ve found a little piece of our long-term dream and we’re making it work.  I watch the variety of birds coming to feed as the sun sets, getting the last nibble of the day before the bats come out.  I listen to the stream running full thanks to the rain, and still find it one of the most restful sounds I’ve ever heard.

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I am hugely grateful that we took the plunge and decided to follow our dream, and start a whole new way of living.  It’s hard work living this way, using our own coppiced woodland to provide fuel for heating, cooking and hot water.  Looking after a woodland and wetland and bog garden, of around two acres, requires every available hour of daylight and some serious wet-weather clothing.  And we’re learning as we go with the vegetable patch, expanding into poly-tunnels next year (we hope).

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Every evening brings us to the Rayburn, slightly soggy and smiling, covered with aches, wood shavings and clay.  We’re always proud of what we’ve achieved during the day, and mostly knackered but happy.  We’ve found our happy place, our next chapter.  We’re learning, day by day, to let go of the old way of doing, and focusing on being.  It takes time.

Dinah x

 

In my opinion…

 

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In my opinion, there is too much hate in the world.  Too many young people taught to continue the hatred developed and nurtured by their elders and ancestors. Too many reasons found to continue the hate despite all the obvious ones to end it, to move on.

in my opinion, there are too many people afraid to speak out for fear of offending the sensibilities of another. Fear that prevents progress, prevents stopping wars and deaths, prevents conversation.

in my opinion, people are too keen to point the finger, to say “It’s because of what you did to my people” or “it’s your fault because you hurt us first”. So determined to say “your offence is worse than mine” that they’ve failed to see how abhorrent their own actions have become.

in my opinion, it is only when we can make the bravest decisions that we can make progress. Only when we can be free to say “Your way is not for me, my children, my future” that we can have hope of change.

in my opinion, it is only when we create a world where it is safe for a woman to express her opinion without fear of rape, persecution or death for doing so, that we will ever have hope of a peaceful future.

In my opinion, it is only once we move past religion and into an understanding that everyone is living a great and wonderful gift, the gift of one life,  one chance to love and make a difference to others, that we can hope.

in my opinion, living in a world where I have to say “in my opinion” to prevent offending anyone, where I have to stop and wonder “will someone hate me for this?” is a sad truth, a life less than content.

What’s your opinion?

 

Dinah